Author: daniel

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“The Man in the Arena” by Theodore Roosevelt

It is better to try and fail than to live life with regret.

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

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All Black Haka

The Haka is a traditional ancestral war cry, dance or challenge from the Māori people of New Zealand. In the modern age, their Rugby team, the All Blacks, have a tradition of chanting the Haka before every match. It’s is quite the impressive sight to see. I don’t know what it would be like to stand across from this, but it gives me chills just to see it on video.

The All Blacks vs. England

The teacher of the Haka:

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The Power of Purpose – 3 – Craig Hamilton : The Way of the Evolutionary Man

Cosmic Evolution

Craig believes that there is a cosmic or divine force that is directing evolution in the universe. This force is manifested in all things. His idea of cosmic evolution follows this course:

  • Starting with the Big Bang
  • Which then evolved into stars
  • Which then evolved into galaxies with stars
  • Which then evolved into stars with planets
  • Which then evolved into stars with planets with life
  • Which then evolved into stars with planets with sentient life
  • Which is now evolving into stars with planets with sentient life that is merging with tecnology. (The tecnhoverse)

Now, being a scientist, I can say that planets don’t evolve. There’s no natural selection or mating involved. I’m not sure what two planets mating would look like, but I’m sure it’d be pretty explosive.

This overriding evolution is directed by a cosmic force, or divinity, or some kind of guiding influence that is separate from each of us.

Now regardless of whether or not there is a cosmic force that drives us to improve and succeed, the focus of purpose is identifying what you feel urged to do and following that urge. If the source is a cosmic separate entity, then we need to find out how to tap into that source in order to discover our purpose. If it is an inner will that we are born with or developed in our upbringing, then we need to identify if it is real to us and if so, how to follow it.

This drive, or force, which causes to improve is easily identified. It causes us to do certain things like:

  • Learn
  • Take risks (even life threatening ones)

Evolution of conscience

He also believes in an evolution of morallity which follows this pattern:

  • From Animals who live a life of finding food, fighting, or escaping and live in fear of other animals.
  • Tribal Humans who live a life of finding food, fighting, or escaping, and sometimes cooperate instincts who fear other tribes. (The Hatfields vs the McCoy)
  • Modern Humans who live in societies that cooperate for food, fighting, and prospering yet fear other societies. (The Americans vs the Canadians)
  • Global Humans who live in cooperative societies, who cooperate for food, and no longer have a need for fighting and live as one happy global family. (I’m a moral human being or a Saint)

Shedding Fear and Following our Hearts

In order to move from an animal to a global human, the thing we need to shead is fear. In our current age, it is our fear that keeps us from following our passion and our purpose.

Tapping into that divine to access the higher power can give us the power we need to overcome our ego (which is our selfish, fearful side). As you learn to shead fear and follow your hearts and trust in the divine influence of whatever cosmic force is out there, it will feel good to you and allow you to move forward despite the fear. In the end there are two sides: One that lives in fear, and one that follows the higher purpose. You choose which one to follow.

Our need to feel in control can keep us from moving forward and imprison us in a “safe zone” when the reality is nothing is safe. We could all lose our jobs at any moment or our economy could collapse or any number of tragedies could happen. learning to roll with the punches while still moving forward is key to being able to succeed.

However, you don’t just start wondering off. Make a long term plan, work toward it, and trust that things will work out.

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Inspiring Song of the Day – Stubborn Love by the Lumineers

I avoid posting love songs, but this one had a few points that I like.

She’ll tear a hole in you. The one you can’t repair.

But I still lover her I don’t even care.

I like these lyrics because they speak of following something that you want without justification.

It’s better to feel pain, than nothing at all.

These speak of understanding that failure is okay and a heck of a lot better than being forever stuck.

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The Power of Purpose – 2 – Mike Robbins

Mike Robbins is the author of the book Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken. He was interviewed for the power of purpose summit and here’s a few takaways that I got from him.

Freedom Through Failure

In life we’re driving to succeed and even if we’re not doing well at it we’ll try and try and try until the very bitter end. That is if you’re a driven individual. Many people do not have a lot of drive and therefore they float through life with out ambition, goals, or any indication of a path that they’re on. However, most people work, slave away, and try to earn more and more money and work very hard to support their families and themselves. Sometimes we get so caught up in working and succeeding that it takes a catastrophic failure to move forward or switch gears.

Steve Jobs spoke about this during his Stanford commencement address when he talked about getting fired from his own company. Looking back, he can see that it was for the best because it freed him from the responsibility and burden of Apple and allowed him to create Pixar and Next. If he’d never been fired, the world would have never been blessed with Monster’s Inc. or Toy Story.

My friend talked about this when she was beaten up by her husband. For years she endured emotional abuse, but when he finally physically abused her she felt that it was socially acceptable to leave. Before, with just emotional abuse, she was worried people would think that she didn’t try hard enough or wasn’t a good enough wife. However, no one would justify a man beating up his wife. Thus she left and was free to get a divorce and eventually meet a great man who loved her and cared for her.

Mike Robbins also encountered this when he was injured while playing baseball. His life was setup to be a professional baseball player and when he injured himself, he was greatly saddened, but deep down felt a kind of relief from the burden of social and family expectations to be a great baseball player. By himself he couldn’t tell everyone who had been rooting for him and supporting his baseball for almost two decades that he didn’t want to do it anymore. However, by being injured and being unable to play, he was freed from the burden of responsibility and allowed to change direction in his life.

Freedom without Failure

Now the reason each of these people tell their story is to help teach us through their example. They are working to free your mind from it’s self imposed social, familial, and other obligations that are not really there and allow you to move onto a new path freely and without having to endure the pain that they felt.

Hidden Obligations

The second main benefit from Mike’s failure is that it revealed to him some of the driving forces and reasons for continuing baseball even as he was feeling as though he didn’t want to pursue it anymore. A primary one, and one that many people feel, was an obligation to be the the “good kid” or the “perfect child”. The siblings who go off the deep end and reject their parents ideals and beliefs are viewed as “lucky to still be alive” and the parents will love them while telling the other child that they’re lucky they have “at least one good son” or “one of the kids turned out okay” all the while the “good son” or “good daughter” is living a life that is unsatisfying. This came up in the truth box where people want to get out of their religion, or career, or place they live, or degree program. But expectations set by the parents, leaders, and other outside forces keep them on the straight path to “happiness” as defined by their elders. Mike was able to discover that he had been secretly working to please his mother. His mother had come to all the games and sacrificed and after seeing her enthusiasm and her support, he couldn’t “let her down” and just quit. He felt trapped.

 

For more information you can buy his book, Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken from Amazon. or check out his website at mike-robbins.com

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The Power of Purpose – 1 – Day 1 Introduction

The people over at the ManKind project put on a online summit called the Power of purpose. See here: http://otp.mkp.org/powerofpurposesummit/

The Premise of Purpose

I decided to go over some takeaways that I took from listening to the summit. In the introduction Chris Kyle and George Daranyi ask some poignant questions about purpose. They set up he basic premise:

That people are born with an innate purpose or reason for their existence. Nothing happens by accident and we all are here because we have something to give to the world.

Regardless whether or not you believe in this premise, this must be true for us to set out and discover our purpose. Now some may think this is narcissistic or overly grandiose but what the heck?A little narcissim is normal for everyone. Only when it goes crazy and becomes a personality disorder do you need to be worried. Also, believing that your gift to the world is teaching others or helping lift others up or some kind of benevolent giving action isn’t a bad thing.

Finding Purpose

George and Chris set up two questions that are to be answered:

  1. Have you answered your inner call to your purpose? In this question it is assumed that we all have some inner drive to accomplish something or do something and finding what that something is may or may not be easy and may or may not be something that we have done yet.
  2. If you have found your purpose, what have you done to fulfill it? The idea being that many people may have found their purpose, but in the interest of dealing with the minutiae of life, they relegate their purpose to a hobby in the workshop in the basement. This is especially true for men.
This next song is about putting your dreams on hold and doing whatever it takes to pay the rent.
This next song is about putting your dreams on hold and doing whatever it takes to pay the rent.

The next point they made was about the different types of purpose:

Collective Purpose and Individual Purpose

Some people find purpose in a collective way such as in a religion (The Pope), or political group (The President), or some other group working toward a higher purpose.

Some people find purpose in an individual way such as a painter (Thomas Kinkade), sculpture (Michelangelo), writer (Stephen King) , computer programmer (Richard Stallman).

For more information go to the ManKind Project: http://mankindproject.org

You can also find out more about Chris Kyle from : http://www.ascendantcompany.com/

and George Daranyi from: http://www.georgedaranyi.com/

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The Limitless Man: The Four Pillars of Manhood

  1. Integrity. Say what you’re going to do and do what you say you will.
    Do not judge or blame yourself for your failures, but do take responsibility for them.
  2. Don’t take anything personally.Girl doesn’t call back? Don’t take it personally.
    Job doesn’t work out? Don’t take it personally.
    Got a speeding ticket? Don’t take it personally.
    Get the hint?
  3. Don’t make assumptions.Girl is too pretty and she’d never like you? Don’t assume that.
    You’re not smart enough for that job? Don’t assume that.
    You’ll never be able to get a college degree? Don’t assume that.
    Things will work out in the end? Don’t assume that!
  4. Always put forth your best effort.We can’t lie to ourselves. You know when you’re doing 100% and when you’re not. Enough said!
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The Litany Against Fear

If you’re a science fiction buff it’s probably stands to reason that you’ve seen this before. I think everyone should say this once a day as it is a great quote. It is the Bene Gesserit Litany against fear.

“I must not fear.

Fear is the mind-killer.

Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.

I will face my fear.

I will permit it to pass over me and through me.

And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.

Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.

Only I will remain”

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Becoming a Limitless Man: Power

Your power is your ability to affect change in your life.
We limit our power in several ways.

Shame

We can feel shame for many, many things. As men this is especially true when dealing with women. If you look at a beautiful woman you can be accused of objectifying them. If you’re attracted to younger women, you’re accused of being a pervert. If talk to a very pretty girl and you’re not the reincarnation of Adonis himself, then they think you’re weird. As men, it’s very hard to throw off the shame imposed on us by others so that we can go for what we want.

Shame can be overcome by recognizing that you should live with no regrets and you don’t need any justification to follow what you want and what you are going for.

Q: “Why are you hiking that mountain? I don’t understand. It’s 16 miles and you’re going to be sore and tired and dirty and gross and you might die”
A: “Because I want to”
Q: “Why are you checking out that girl!?!?”
A: “Because I think she’s beautiful.”
Q: “Why do guys like big boobs?”
A: “I don’t know, but I like them too.”

Lack of focus

You can spend large amounts of time watching TV, playing games, and puttering around and not get anything done.

Overcoming a lack of focus can be done in a couple of ways. One way is to go on a media fast. Get rid of our TV, Video Games, and other mindless entertainment. A second way is to journal. If you want something you need to journal about it to know that you’re making progress. A third way is to master your first hour. This is the first hour in your day that can set the mood for the whole day. A fourth thing is to do the worst thing first. If you’ve got a particularly nasty thing to do one day, do it first so that everything else that day becomes easier. There are hundreds of books on getting things done.

Timidity

Sometimes you’re afraid to do something and you’re shy or you need help and are afraid to ask for it.

Overcoming timidity is difficult. Especially if you’re on your own. However, you can cultivate friends, buddies, wing-men, and others to help give you courage. Also, you must actually put forth effort and go out and DO! If you don’t, you’ll never get past this point. You can also use accountability buddies who will make sure that you do what you’re supposed to.

Fear of failure

You fear the social pressure of failure. As men we’re meant to succeed and dealing with failure is not an easy thing.
The only thing to say about this is life is about the journey. There is no failure, there is only feedback. Make sure when you fail, you learn something from it so you get feedback and can improve.

Fear of Success

We fear that if we succeed we’ll be given more responsibility than we can handle. “I can barely take care of myself, how am I going to take care of a wife and family?”
One of the pivotal, central, core parts to being a man is to take responsibility for yourself and your life. If it isn’t what you want, then it’s your fault and you need to do something about it. If you don’t do it. Nobody else will.

Negative Conditioning

This is social pressure caused by others around us and taught to us when we’re young. “Go to college and get a college degree”, “Make sure you make a lot of money”, “Never ask for help as men do things by themselves” are all some lessons that men get taught growing up.

Rest and Recovery

Power needs rest. Make sure you have sufficient sleep. Take a day off every week where you can just goof off, but work hard the rest of the week. This goes for diets as well. If you eat perfect 6 days and bad 1 day, you’ll look awesome.

For more on this please visit my friend Rick at: www.scpua.com