Author: daniel

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Becoming a Limitless Man: Love

Love: It’s all about connection

Connection is your ability to care about, connect, find common ground, and get along with other people.

Disconnecting

You can disconnect from other people in many ways:

  1. Fear (I’m afraid to meet other people)
  2. Disconnected mindset (more concerned with video games or work than the people there)
  3. Being nice rather than real. (this can build resentment)
  4. Being unauthentic. Helping other people and expecting something rather than just being helpful.

Reconnecting

  • Reverse Time travel meditation (picture yourself in 5 years talking to yourself now. What would they say?)
  • Never eat alone (not at work or when you’re out or whenever.)
  • Future pace (where will you be in 5 years and what’s the path forward to that)
  • Direct approach (go talk to people)
  • Appreciation and Gratitude for your life

For more on this please visit my friend Rick at: www.scpua.com

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Becoming a Limitless Man: Truth

I went to a quick little seminar called “Becoming a Limitless Man”. It discussed some of the ways we limit ourselves and how to recognize our limits, overcome them, and grow in strength. Here’s my take:

Truth: Things as they actually are


Truth is things as they actually are. It doesn’t care about your viewpoint, others viewpoints, opinions, beliefs, hopes, dreams, or anything else. It is the actual reality. It is rare for us to see and recognize the real truth.

Beliefs limit us from seeing the truth


Our reality is distorted by our beliefs. These beliefs come from lots of different places. Some of them are formed by our past experiences.

  • “Every time I ask for a girls’ phone number she says no”
  • “Every time I go back home for vacation my mom nags me”

Lots of time these past experience beliefs become created in absolutist terms.

They can come from social conditioning. Our friends, family, mentors, teachers, religious authority figures, all give us some of their advice, knowledge, and experience. Then we accept their beliefs as our own.

  • “It’s good to be married”
  • “Drinking alcohol is bad”
  • “You shouldn’t ask that person out as they’re not good for you”

Another way to generate beliefs are from Secondary Gain or the “Good Enough Syndrome”.

  • “I keep my job because it gives me money even though it drives me crazy.”
  • “My boyfriend is nice to me and takes care of me even though I don’t really like him.”

Limiting beliefs


Now not all beliefs are bad, some of them are good. If you get sick whenever you drink milk, the truth is you’re probably lactose intolerant. Your experience taught you that and no amount of believing otherwise is going to change that. However, when you can identify a belief as unreal. Like, “I’m lonely” when you actually have a lot of friends. Or “I’m fat” when you’re actually skinny. These are false beliefs that are harming you and you need to over come them and embrace the truth.

Paths to overcoming our truth


1. Try new things for 30 days
2. Social conditioning can be overcome by learning to trust yourself
3. Remove yourself from media
4. Travel. Traveling is fatal to prejudice
5. Simply getting older will give you more experience which will help you see the truth
6. Cultivate the observing ego

For more on this please visit my friend Rick at: www.scpua.com

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The Truth Box

One of the interesting and special things about humans is that they can keep secrets. It comes from our unique ability to tell lies. Your dog doesn’t lie to you, neither does your fish. If you leave your dog and they don’t like that, they are sure to find a way to let you know. When you come home they are sure to tell you if they love you or not. Now, they aren’t that consistent with their emotions, loving you one minute and then getting revenge on you by ripping up the pillows when you leave them alone, but they, at least, aren’t being dishonest with their feelings.

But people lie to each other all the time. Babies will fake a cry. 1 year olds know to conceal. 2 years olds can bluff. 5 year olds will use flattery. 9 year olds have mastered covering up. On any given day we may get 10-200 lies in one day. Strangers within a few minutes will lie to each other 10 times. Most of them are white lies. But, we will do it to keep secrets, for social dignity, to cover our butts, and most of them are good or harmless. Sometime is is very, very harmful. For example when there are spies, insider trading, the mortgage crisis, and such. However, we’re not here to solve the worlds problems. Rather, we want to look at ourselves and the lies that we tell ourselves. These lies can be the most destructive.

We lie to ourselves all the time. Usually it is caused by intense (or not) real or perceived social pressure. Trying to maintain dignity, trying to keep up with the Jones, trying to keep up with appearances. These can be a destructive way to live your life. So what do we do? We pull out the Truth Box. Basically, you write down what everyone thinks, which identifies the social pressure. Then you write down what the truth actually is. It can be a freeing moment just to identify the deceptions that we live with. It’s amazing that some people will live with their lies their whole life.

If you’re ready to take the first baby step here’s a truth box for you to use. All submissions are, of course, anonymous.

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